Politics: Obama pardons Thanksgiving turkeys

Published by: Robert Laurie on Wednesday November 21st, 2012

Robert Laurie

By ROBERT LAURIE - Fat birds off the hook.  American people? Still on it.

This afternoon, as has become tradition, the President pardoned a pair of turkeys, sparing them from tomorrow's Thanksgiving feast.  This year’s birds are named Cobbler and Gobbler, and Obama joked that rather than being eaten, they'd be "moving forward."

Cue the rim shot and the groans.

The President also took the time to suggest that the season is all about second chances - which it's not - and that he's thrilled to have been given a second chance on Election Day.  He made no mention of the fact that, as a result of the terrible economy and rampant joblessness, birds this big would have been difficult for the average American to afford.

Thanks to this man's policies, a record number of U.S. citizens will purchase their Thanksgiving dinner with food stamps this year.  But here he is, yukking it up on the White House lawn.  He just loves those birds!